SEX FORCE: The Vital Power explains how careful control of sexual desire enhances sexual magnetism and promotes happy unions.
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PDF of entire book Private Lessons in the Cultivation of Sex Force (free)
Excerpts
Many men wonder, more or less cynically, why women begin to complain so soon after marriage; why headaches and backaches develop, why a marked lassitude appears which they are prone to characterize as ‘‘laziness;’’ it never occurs to them for a moment that the cause of their wives’ indisposition lies at their own door and that no female organism, however healthy, can withstand the strain of trying to satisfy an abnormal sex appetite, which is really insatiable. But the opinion has become general that however unlimited the sex appetite of the husband, it is the wife’s ‘‘duty’’ to submit, so she submits, to the loss of her health, the shattering of her nervous system and the development of a chronic irritation which destroys the peace of the home.
Keep it firmly impressed upon your mind that a successful life is founded on the attraction of personal magnetism and this is developed from habitual self-control and the conservation of force which this insures. Do not overweary the brain or misuse the functions of the body.
It cannot be denied that many troubles have arisen out of the association of the sexes but that is because the great Sex Force has not been understood, and its impulses blindly followed. Aware only of its impelling strength, the possibility of controlling it never occurs to the mind of youth and when mentioned is at first regarded as impossible. But, if troubles arise out of the ill-considered yielding to this great force, its intelligent control and direction develop the best qualities of heart and mind.…
When the marriage is inharmonious, how- ever, the magnetic battery is broken, and the vital forces are consequently wasted. In such a union constant disharmony prevails, and not only temper, but also the moral strength and physical health are affected, more or less seriously, corresponding to the degree of disharmony. Moreover, no one can measure the distress of mind suffered by both husband and wife when either one finds his marriage a mistake and his partner unworthy of his love, confidence and respect.
The main purpose of Sex Force is not to propagate the race; it has a higher and nobler purpose; primarily intended to draw the sexes into closer communion with each other by means of its subtle attraction, this communion is designed to develop the spiritual nature of man, and transform the individual into a higher and nobler being.
It has been argued by some objectors to marital continence that it would produce coldness between husband and wife, and that the happiness of the home would suffer without this demonstration of affection, but is this so? Was it the case during the period of courtship? Not at all; though the wooer did not hesitate to show his feelings and express his love, if he was a true man he did not even for a moment entertain the thought of intruding upon her sacred ground. Her honor was sacred to him and he guarded it as his own, even against himself. The gratification of his pleasure was not even considered. … Couples that have spent six or eight years in harmonious courtship that not only gave happiness to both but was a source of mental and spiritual strength while the relation lasted, find themselves obnoxious to each other after but a short period of marriage; why? The answer has been clearly given in these pages; sex-intemperance.
All desire is of mental origin, and when continence is fully believed in, kisses and endearments will fully satisfy the sex nature.
Seminal waste among animals is a rare exception; whereas in man, with all his ‘higher’ powers, and notwithstanding his mental development, such waste is unhappily the rule, arising out of his mistaken conviction that sexual passion is a law of nature, and therefore cannot be controlled. This is nonsense; he can control it if he will.
Of all the laws, this is the safest to follow for most persons. You should aim to mate with one whose nature completes, or complements your own; they should have the qualities in which you are deficient. The two halves should blend and make a whole. Persons who are well balanced may marry extremes, or such as are similar to themselves, but extremes should try to select a partner who will have a tendency to round off their sharp edges.
When you live such a life that your mind is filled with sexual thoughts your work will suffer when your passions become aroused. … Owing to our inherited instincts, we do not say you can at all times keep away such thoughts and suggestions, but the following illustration is as true as can be: ‘‘We cannot keep the sparrows from playing over our head, but we can prevent them from making their nests in our hair.’’
Sexual power is the concentration of all the bodily powers. There have been some people in the past, and there are some in the present, that have looked upon the sexual force as sinful, and to be subdued by asceticism. But they learn in time that this is not the present natural law of life. Under the practice of asceticism, the forces do not become obedient, but instead, the greatest ‘‘saints’’ have had the greatest sexual temptations to contend with. There is no question that the principle of asceticism is not the natural law of life, and brings its own penalty.