Our bodies yearn for tenderness…
People believe that having a conversation with someone, friend or family member or anyone, means to find a common topic to “relate” to them, or to “hook” them with an exciting idea, a funny joke, or gossip. Moments where there is nothing to say, or moments of disconnect, are quickly covered over, found an escape from. We model our conversations similar to how we model sex- to build up to an orgasm, to keep increasing “turn on” and excitement. Any moment where there is nothing going on are glossed over, blocked out of consciousness.
Every single sex “therapy”, sex “coach” , “tantric teaching” is about giving you techniques and methods to increase the turn on, increase the excitement, bring it to full throttle, have a hotter orgasm, or even to do a slow mindful “practice” together SO that you can have “hotter” more exciting sex.
It is literally unimaginable to people to have intercourse in complete stillness, to sit with the discomfort of having nothing to “hook” the other with, just sitting there together with your bodies connected. Few have the courage and fortitude to feel the deadness & numbness within your body together with your lover when you come together in stillness, to come to the realization that all you have done together has been in the name of performance, that even when you believed you were shaking with the pleasure of an orgasm, you were both barely feeling each other, lost off in a trance-state of your own world.
If you are willing to face this Guardian of the Threshold, which is your false self, you will see the other side of stillness. Your pelvic floor will unlock, sink onto the earthy flesh terrain of partners, and for the first time you both will make actual contact with your relaxed, pulsing genitals. Tenderness is here. There is a connection between two people that doesn’t “form” from some-thing, it exists underneath all mental ideas, in no-thingness, in the empty spaces between your ideas of pleasure that nobody dares to look or feel because they are so terrified of it.
Today I see the world in the celestial gentleness with which creation shines. There is no fear in it. Let no appearance of my sins obscure the light of Heaven shining on the world. What is reflected there is in God’s Mind. The images I see reflect my thoughts. Yet is my mind at one with God’s. And so I can perceive creation’s gentleness.
ACIM-265.1:3-1:9
