The dating and mating environment has deteriorated profoundly in recent decades. At the same time, more people find themselves asking Larger Questions about the meaning of life and their role in it.
In fact, even very accomplished scientists and professionals now ponder the overlap between physics (such as quantum entanglement) and metaphysics. Walking the tight rope between rigour and open-mindedness, such observers openly investigate the intersection between science and consciousness.
Might this trend offer hope for the many involuntary celibates dreaming of life-enhancing unions with loving partners?
Synchronicity and mate choice
If indeed mind and matter interact in formerly unsuspected ways, can would-be lovers tap some level of expanded guidance in the vital matter of mating? Yes, by benefitting from synchronicity.
You can define the term as, “meaningful occurrences that come to your attention, which have special significance for you, but which are not linked by cause and effect”. That is, you did nothing to bring them about. They feel like encouraging messages sent just for you from a benevolent force.
This 8-minute video offers a brief primer on the concept:
If you are open to finding a mate, try putting out a request for insights related to your search. In the interim, do your best to set aside your longings and get on with what needs doing in your life. Focus especially on those goals that would make you a better mate yourself. Maybe you need to let go of some habit of overindulgence. Or learn a new skill. Or simply clean your living quarters and pay your bills. It’s fine to start small.
Another synchronicity tool
It can be fun to allow synchronicities in your daily life to inspire beneficial choices. However, you may find that you hunger for more specific guidance, or a “dialogue” to help you hear more clearly which way the wind is blowing in a given situation. For example, you might wonder if you should accept or offer an invitation to hang out with a work colleague or someone you met in a café. Or you might be pondering the significance of a particular text or email.
This is where the I Ching comes in. Some claim the I Ching (Book of Changes) is the oldest book in the world. Swiss psychiatrist Carl Gustav Jung found it profoundly helpful in guiding his personal development. It’s a divination tool.
If you want to experiment for yourself, acquire a paper edition of the I Ching (used is fine). You’ll quickly learn to throw 3 coins to build 6-line hexagrams and receive guidance.
Be aware that there are many translations of the I Ching. So, examine several to see which you feel drawn to. Or watch for synchronicities to lead you to a particular edition!
Free versions of the I Ching are also available today online. But it’s best to train yourself first with a paper version. You’ll discover that working with a physical copy allows the deepest contemplation and yields the greatest insight. Once you develop a solid sense of how the I Ching operates, you may want to add an online version to your tool chest. If you dislike ads, try an inexpensive phone app.
Whatever format you use, make notes as you “listen” to the responses. It can be illuminating to look back and realise that you were indeed well guided regardless of earlier doubts.
Not a magic lamp
Keep in mind that seeking guidance via synchronicity is not like rubbing a magic lamp. Whatever you may long for, or hope to be guided to acquire or achieve, synchronicity will point you to the best path open to you in the short-term. Always with a view to your long-term highest good and the highest good of those around you.
Perhaps you need a time-out to rethink how you manage your sexual energy so that you can steer for sustainable harmony. In such a case you could be led to explore solo sexual cultivation, for example.
Or maybe you need more time to let go of an obsession with a lost love whose companionship is not, in fact, in your best interest. None of us like enforced time-outs. Yet sometimes the best option is for circumstance to “take the knife out of our hands” while we’re bent on destructive/self-destructive behaviour.
Alternatively, if your long-term happiness and wellbeing require you to adjust your priorities in a mate before meeting your next partner, you may have to endure a further period of celibacy while you learn to re-jig your desires. Just because you (like every other human mammal) feel strongly attracted (and entitled) to the office hunk or hottie, it doesn’t mean that such a connection is best for either of you.
Keep in mind that your ideal partner may not appear like a convenience meal, with palpable chemistry on both sides. Consider using the I Ching to guide you. If you rely instead on your biological urges you could be wasting time and emotional investment for nothing. Or worse.
If you can allow yourself to be guided (rather than stubbornly demanding a mate on your terms and your schedule), you’ll accumulate less karma from selfishness. This is a heavy topic, which need not concern you at the outset of your experiments with synchronicity. Just keep it in the back of your mind as you explore.
Final tips
Synchronistic guidance is as loud as your willingness to listen. Thus, if you’ve made up your mind and are not truly open to gaining (perhaps unwanted) insight, you will have trouble comprehending, let alone applying, the synchronistic signals that come your way.
Meditation, time in nature and quiet time without digital distraction help centre you. They are good ways to increase your clarity, reception and connection with expanded consciousness.
Finally, inflamed appetites (cravings) of any type can profoundly distort “hearing”. The more we indulge our physical appetites the more intense subsequent cravings.
Enjoy exploring the synchronicities in your life. And may they lead you to the right person at the right time with the right mind-set for the highest good of you both!
