Even if you are intrigued by the possibility of Synergy practices, a sore lower back can dampen your enthusiasm. Fitness issues are common amongst people of all ages.
I am a woman of 61 and have been with my partner for almost nine years, practising Synergy all that time. Yet it wasn’t until I read the excerpt from Chapter One of the Synergy book on this website that I realised that we might benefit more from ‘daily’ intimate contact, whether intercourse or sexual meditation with genital touching. At that time, our closest practice was usually confined to a weekend day. That way we could take our time.
Of course, we hugged often during the day, every day, and most evenings my sweetheart would massage my feet as we snuggled closely on the sofa. I assumed those bonding behaviours were enough, but it turns out we had hidden potential.
The initial obstacle to practising Synergy more frequently was my sore back. I have had lower back pain off and on for 40 years. Most of the time, it merely gnaws away in the background just below conscious awareness. I’ve long blamed a fall from a horse as a young teenager, but truth be told, my back pain is more likely related to insufficient exercise and too much time sitting at a desk. In other words, poor fitness. A scoliosis also contributes. Although low-grade pain lurks most of the time, it seldom requires medication or a healthcare visit.
When I stumbled upon the suggestion of ‘daily’ intercourse or sexual meditation, I feared that moving around the bed, changing sides, entwining legs and so on could put strain on my back and trigger more pain. However, as a willing explorer, I dared to give it a go. Pain or no pain, I didn’t want an obstacle to cause me to miss out on Synergy’s potential benefits.
Nor did my husband complain. He was more than delighted to experiment with daily genital contact.
What I found was amazing. First of all, soft entry turned out to be no problem. Natural lubrication soon happened more quickly too. Perhaps a sort of muscle memory tells the body that sexual activity is about to commence, if it’s frequent enough.
Second, I no longer felt the need to engage for an hour or two each time, as I had when our lovemaking only happened once a week. That was freeing. Of course, sometimes our extra sessions do spontaneously last an hour or so.
Third, the subtle energy exchange and breathing exercises of the genital meditation help me in a range of ways. I have more energy during the day to actually engage in the fitness exercises that improve my back. We have taken up a short daily yoga practice and even completed a “Couch to 5 km” running programme. Also, I notice that I manage my working schedule better around the exercise regimes. Finally, I invested in an electronic standing desk. Over the course of the day, I periodically stand at my desk with a wobble board to build the core muscles that support my lower back.
My sore back bothers me less than it did before, and I am hoping that strengthening my core muscles will help further. I have been doing the Five Tibetan Rites practice with my mate and some postural yoga. Both practices have given me much more flexibility in my lower back. We have also been doing slow jogging every other day and have built up to 30 minutes a session. Improving my fitness can only be a good thing as I grow older too. Synergy has undoubtedly given me the energy and motivation to do this.
I enjoy starting the day with a naked snuggle. Best of all, my husband and I have noticed even greater feelings of intimacy and wellbeing.